Slowness Drifts In

A random walk through Hong Kong and this road appears. Slow. Left Turn. The mists and the hills. It felt right for this moment.

Creatively things are slow this week especially on the writing front. Morning pages continue to flow but the words don’t make the leap here. It’s a function of where my head is at in any given moment. Life has been busy. Competing. Edgar’s illness. Work. It can be a bit overwhelming and sometimes other pieces fade to the background. Inspiration finds its way into our lives in different ways and I’ve found that keeping my mind open has been key. This morning, sitting down with my book, it became apparent that my morning pages have been filling up with threads of self-doubt. Only a sentence or two but appearing on a daily basis. Morning pages is a place to stick the workings of my mind and when these themes show up it’s important for me to listen.

Writing the words down enough times it becomes clear I need to shift something. Listening to Casey Neistat (VLogger and YouTube Filmmaker) on Tim Ferriss’ podcast reminded me of the importance of being honest with ourselves in our work. It came at the right time. Already thinking about a needed shift, my mind connected Casey’s own thoughts on creativity with my own. Casey chatted about the challenges of preparing a video every day and the struggles he faced. Being honest with the real possibility that he may not have enough interesting things to talk about. He went to work on a daily basis and came home to his family not seeing where the creative spark would come from. That line has been in my morning pages. What am I going to talk about?  What is interesting enough in my daily life that I should write about?

“Above all, you want to create something you are proud of. … I can honestly say that I have never gone into any business purely to make money. If that is the sole motive than I believe you are better off not doing it.” – Richard Branson

Imagine the things that would fill these pages if I could sit back and just dump the contents of my mind onto a page. The filter we place on ourselves prevents it though. Self-doubt, when allowed to grow, provides that filter. The struggle with not finding something to talk about is that my writing suffers. The art of writing is to write; by not doing it the rust starts to collect. The rust is tangible and seems to grow exponentially or at least it feels like it. So here we are. Shaking the rust off and talking about nothing really. Talking though and that’s enough. The slowness that feels to be occurring right now with my writing.

Three thoughts for fellow writers and creative types:

  1. Keep going. As boring as this post may be it is still an interesting topic for me because it represents a small step forward. Writing. Editing. Thinking about a photograph from Hong Kong.
  2. Your life may not feel interesting at times but perhaps your perspective on that boredom and feeling is. There is likely at least one other person out there right now struggling with the exact same thing. I am. This may be an opportunity to connect.
  3. Recognize the self-doubt as thoughts passing through the mind no different than any other thought; positive or negative. We accept them, sit with them, then let them go. Rinse and repeat.



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